Guest Blogger

From time to time, as y'all know, I like to include after action reports written by "comrades" I have served beside on the border line between Tierra Del Sol and Tecate, California.  Red Army is one such "comrade".  Please be advised that  Red Army is actually a red blooded patriotic American spending his own time and money defending our porous southern frontier.  He is also a historian and participates in WWII re-creations.  He doesn't break character in his reports and is really not the communist bastard he sometimes pretends to be.  He, like those of you who read and support this blog, is a great American.
I spoke with another fellow patriot yesterday, Bravo 2.  Bravo 2 was on the line with Red Army over the last weekend's deployment but stayed through the night and held his position at the "couch trail".  This so infuriated the enemy that, over the radio, they threatened to kill Bravo 2.  Bravo 2, in typical Patriot Point Posse fashion fired two rounds into to the ground and exclaimed over the radio, "Bring it on!"
There were no takers to his invitation.

And now, it is my pleasure to bring you  THE RED ARMY REPORT

This is an Official Communication of the Political Department of the Red Army HQ, Southern Front Command.

Re: After Action Report on Southern Front Operations on 8/30/08

Comrades Red Army and Rubber Ducky departed for the Front at approximately 0745hrs, after filling stomachs at IHOP and topping off the tank. Multiple cups of coffee were consumed and much smack was talked.

Red Army's father, call sign Red Hand, could not attend due to previous commitments with guests over the Holiday Weekend, celebrating the labor of the glorious working class. Long live the Proletariat!

Comrades arrived at the Point HQ not long after the departure of Comrades C1 and Hotshot. It should be noted that Front HQ has nominated Comrade Hotshot for Canine Order of the Red Banner for his valorous service at the Front!

Comrades Shorty and Wildcard greeted us with a gift of more coffee, fresh made, and boxes of the Olin Company's finest. A situation report was discussed, during the course of which two spotters were detected atop 241. One was wearing a bright white shirt and dark baseball cap, the other was in green fatigue pants and a light brown t-shirt. The one in white had and was using what appeared to be a powerful set of optics.

At this time comrades conducted a communications check, during which enemy forces began using Rubber Ducky's call sign. In response to this, and in the longstanding Russian tradition of maskrovka "masquerade/disinformation" Rubber Ducky changed his call sign officially to "GOLF 1".

Red Army and Golf 1 then departed on mobile patrol past 241, shaking up the spotters there, and headed for Cap Rock. We noted an increased amount of private security for the construction equipment stationed in the sector. As a rule, most of them seemed decidedly unfriendly to us, quite unlike the NKVD Border Guards we encountered. With no detectable activity on cap rock, the comrades patrolled down to the train tunnel. It should be noted that a large beehive has taken up residence on the left side of the train tunnel's entrance. They were swarming rather angrily, and must be presumed to be "Africanized" so comrades please be advised. At this point an NKVD Border Guard sped by our position, heading west at high velocity. He disappeared heading toward Tecate. Red Army and Golf 1 moved into the tunnel to clear it. We were stopped and startled by the sound of Spanish on a loudspeaker. We retreated and determined it was Border Patrol west of us. With their helicopter on scene they had caught a group of IA's in the brush about 200 meters west of us. As they tried to flush them out, Golf 1 spotted a single IA rush back into Mexico, running as fast as he could. This individual has a LARGE black backpack, completely stuffed, strapped to his back. With muttered curses we watched this individual escape with is cargo back into Mexico.

Having satisfied ourselves that there were no stragglers in the area, we patrolled back toward 241. It is to be noted that even with more powerful radios, communication to the point from the train tunnel is spotty at best. Comrades, please always have backup there and be prepared. As we returned toward the 241, Comrade Shorty informed us that the spotters were still up there. As we rounded the east side of 241 Red Army noticed that the spotters were both well inside the USA. As a show of bravado, Golf 1 sped up the east side of the 241, engine snarling and kicking up dirt. As the two Comrades reached the end of the road up the east side of 241, and jumped out, geared up and ready to go, both spotters fled quickly back across the border. Below, near tank trap II, two IA's who had made it through the fence broke cover and fled. An NKVD Border Guard was atop the Donut Hole and nabbed the two invaders instantly. A group of 4 other fled from just inside tank trap II back into Mexico.

Red Army and Golf 1 ascended 241 and cleared the area, noting with a certain amount of disdain the amount of litter atop the hill. One would think that at least these spotters could pick up after themselves when assisting in the invasion of a sovereign country.

All morning the wind was blustering and cold, spitting rain at odd intervals. It was WONDERFUL compared to the usual heat. After about 45 minutes atop 241, two NKVD Border Guards ascended on foot. Comrade Bravo 2 advised us of their approach, and provided from his position at the Couch Trail, intel on our blind spots. When the two friendly agents arrived, we gave them an update of the activity we had witnessed, then turned the 241 over to their care.

Red Army and Golf 1 then patrolled east, doing a foot patrol of the area directly below the Donut hole. It was full of tracks, trash, and fresh sign. Additionally, the culvert that is directly across from tank trap II is a natural hide, with a heavy drop from the road and large boulders providing heavy cover for invaders. The two comrades cleared the area and headed back to the Point HQ, stopping to check in with Bravo 2 on the way.

At the Point, they debriefed with Comrades Shorty, Wildcard, Horsepuckies, and Bravo 2.

After winning the international class war and bringing about social and economic revolution through the fine art of talking shit and telling dick jokes while drinking coffee, the two comrades departed again, patrolling out at the base of cap rock. The area was slow, and so they shifted their operations to east of the Point. After a few hours of no discernible enemy activity, they decided to eat.

Calling in to the point, the two headed to the casino. Inside there was the usual sad smell of stale smoke, desperation, and body odor. While eating enchiladas, the two spotted a waitress of uncertain cosmetics and even more uncertain gender. They washed the enchiladas down with more coffee, picked Comrade Shorty up some ice, and then headed back to the point.

They arrived back, reported the festivities of the casino, and then geared up for evening work. Comrade Shorty lent the comrades his night vision gear, pride of State Production! From there some mention was made of everyone's favorite hot-defend-the-border-actress and a smoking hot card dealer at the Casino's Texas hold-em table.

That load of BS properly delivered, Comrades Red Army and Golf 1 then departed for Donut Hole. No sooner had they arrived than the NKVD Border Guards informed them that they were tracking a group that had just broken through somewhere in the immediate vicinity. Using tactical spotlights, the comrades kept both sides and the front of Donut hole cleared. About 30 minutes later, the NKVD reported that the invaders had been caught.

We cannot rave enough about the smart, aggressive, and professional NKVD Border Guards we had the honor of supporting.

Golf 1 and Red Army checked back in off of the line at 2210 hours and said their goodbyes, departing the point after their gear was secure with intent of returning with reinforcements as soon as is practicable.

End of Report

"The time is near at hand which must determine whether Americans are to be free men or slaves."

-George Washington-

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